jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
