So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
