Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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