sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize