girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
It's never too late to be topless.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize