Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I think people are normalizing furries
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
