He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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