She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
