i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
