What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
