The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize