i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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