I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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