I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
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