Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
