i would punch a child for taco bell
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
