He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
