I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
where am i from again
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
