did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
