I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
