I'm gonna have a badass scar
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
