don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
