had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
