I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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