I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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