Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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