You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
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