this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
