a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
