Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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