It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
