Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
