i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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