You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Randomize
