someone get that fucking seahorse.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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