I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
