I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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