But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
