Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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