Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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