I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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