I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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