I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
