if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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