i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
