I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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