i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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