why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
