Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
