Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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